“Culture Eats Strategy For Lunch” - Peter Drucker
Years back, this quote made a profound impact on me. And it remains one of the most valuable.
Being a strong advocate for lasting change, I am aware that strategy alone (planning programmes and meeting quantifiable “KPIs”) may not be enough. Those are important, but to truly raise the resilience of schools and organizations, we must focus on culture.
This is why I write this article. If you’re a teacher or leader in an organization, I fully understand that there are 1001 other things to do.
Hence, I made suggestions simple and implementable. I hope it provides a spark to ignite a culture of resilience wherever you’re placed to serve.
“The bottom line on culture and grit is: If you want to be grittier, find a gritty culture and join it. If you’re a leader, and you want the people in your organization to be grittier, create a gritty culture”- Angela Duckworth in her landmark book ‘Grit’
Here are the 5 Strategies:
1. Models & Narratives
2. Co-Creating Emotional Vocabulary
3. Facilitated Failure & Coaching
4. Growing The Growth Mindset (with caution)
5. Embodying Empathy & Vulnerability (most important and underrated)
(Note: I wrote this article mainly addressing teachers or school leaders, which explains much of my suggestions and examples used. Apply it in your own context if you’re a leader in any other organization or teams!)
1. Models & Narratives
Role models matter. From anecdotal evidence, a common void we see in at risk students is a lack of a guiding figure (or a guiding figure that’s questionable). Conversely, Duckworth’s research into grit paragons reveal that many had a mentor whom helped them believe that they could personally made a difference – where previously they saw value in the goal, but lacked the belief or self-efficacy to pursue it. In others words, role models help shift resilience from the head to the heart.
Naturally, the best option is to set up mentorship programmes. If there are resources for it, great! If not, the next best option would be showcasing stories of role models students look up to (the nuance here is that they must look up to and “idolize” them in some way).
The last option plays on familiarity - bringing in speakers whose stories relate strongly to students’ current concerns and fears, speakers who are vulnerable in their journey and share how they overcame. In this case, liking and familiarity are factors in persuasion.
Last word on this point - Stories trumps statistics; our brains are attuned and persuaded by stories. (click on embedded link to article). Some of the world’s greatest educators and leaders were also spellbinding storytellers. While we may not reach those heights, I firmly believe we can increase our storytelling skill and intention.
In my years of training, the single greatest reward in telling a story is to witness the inspiration in students’ eyes. In that moment, their eyes communicate back– ‘maybe I have the power to tell my own story too’
Suggestions:
1. Find out more about students’ role models. Ask them who they look up to, and then research their origin stories. Being specific in highlighting struggles helps too. (What aspect of the struggle relates to the student you’re coaching? What were the key factors helped them grow stronger from it? What mindsets/actions did they take?)
One example would be BTS (a world renowned KPOP group). While it is easy to shrug off KPOP as a distraction, one can use their example to inspire or help students (who like them) embody similar values. Click here for a thread on their struggles or watch a UN Speech they made below on loving faults, embracing mistakes and speaking your conviction:
2. Showcase role models or local stories during CCE lessons or where appropriate. Stories that resonate and relate. A good add-on would be to debrief and distill specific character strengths or aspects of resilience embodied through the story. This helps students recognise and relate to the principle and then assimilate and apply it to their specific context. A guided reflection will also help in this.
2. Create Specific Vocabulary & Mantras
Words matter. They can destroy or uplift; spit poison or mend a broken soul. We live, communicate and process information ALL through words. This is why certain words can act as emotional triggers and some can have a calming presence.
Hence, it comes as no surprise that one fundamental and intriguing aspect of a resilient culture is the usage of in-group vocabulary or mantras. This refers to a series of stickable shared phrases that anchor certain mindsets and practices around resilience.
Beyond creating a sense of belonging, this practice also facilitates accountability and repetition – both of which are key aspects in lasting attitude and behavioural change. In other words, you create a self-sustaining culture where students remind and encourage each other even without your presence.
“But the magic of culture is that one person’s grit can provide a model for others. If each person’s grit enhances grit in others, then, over time, you might expect what social scientist Jim Flynn calls a “social multiplier” effect - one person’s grit enhances the grit of the others, which in turn inspires more grit in that person, and so on, without end” - Angela Duckworth on Gritty Cultures
Suggestions:
1. Co-create (with students) and display a series of phrases or mantras around resilience. For example, 2 common ones our programmes leave them with are “Failure is a great moment, if we reflect on it”, and “Respond, Don’t React”. The former reminds them of perspective-taking and reflective journaling, while the latter anchors the mindset of focusing on controllables, instead of blaming or complaining. Of course, feel free to be creative!
2. Entrust responsibility to “influencers”. In developing organizational resilience, HR trains specific role models, and entrust them to model and encourage other employees as well. This can be done with specific students who display a higher level of resilience.
3. Ensure phrases are stickable (catchy) and can be repeated easily. Tie those phrases with a specific practice or reminder so students can apply it.
An Example From A Programme
(This summarizes lessons. A good add on is to make them shared and stickable)
3. Facilitated Failure and Coaching
Failing Matters. One question I get asked a lot is “How can I build resilience?”. The answer might surprise you – it is failure. There is no other way to develop resilience except through failure and learning to adapt.
Yet, there is a caveat, it has to be facilitated failure. The old adage ‘What doesn’t kill you makes your stronger’ is only half true. Research shows that ‘What doesn’t kill us can also make us weaker’. The question is Why and How?
To find out, Dr Martin Seligman, widely regarded for this work on positive psychology, did a landmark experiment in 1967. In part 1, he put dogs into two separate cages and gave them electric shocks. In cage 1, the dogs could press a lever to stop the shocks. In Cage 2 however, there was no such option.
In Part 2 of the experiment, he placed the dogs into cages with a low wall separating it into 2. To avoid the shocks, the dogs had to jump over the low wall. He found that the dogs in Cage 2 previously (who believed they had no control of the shocks) were far more likely to ‘resign to their fate’ and not jump over the wall.
This led to him coining the terms ‘Learned Helplessness’ and ‘Learned Optimism’. He later studied this phenomenon in humans and found the difference between both lies in the perception and treatment of failure. He also coined the 3Ps (Personalization, Pervasiveness and Permenance) present in people who are crippled by failure and the opposing beliefs.
How is this relevant to students? Simply put, their failures have to be facilitated. To reference the earlier experiment, we must share and coach them with mindsets and tools to jump over the low wall and transcend the ‘shocks’. If not, when faced with failure, they might resign to their fate and in worser cases, develop psychological issues.
Suggestions:
1. Destigmatize and reframe students perspective to failure. Share the above experiment with students and talk about failure more. There are many Ted Talks or interesting videos you can consider showing them. Click here for a Ted Talk by a popular Youtuber Mark Rober on reframing failure.
2. Aside from perspective, students can be coached to adopt practical tools. One simple and proven way is journaling. There are 2 basic ones that can help: 1. expressive writing and 2. reflective writing. In 1, students can be coached to pen down their thoughts in whatever manner and way they want. It acts as a form of release and catharsis. In 2, this simple framework can be provided to help them: What happened, Why did it Happen & What Can I do to improve? If you wish to go deeper and help them identify and challenge belief systems, click here for the ABCDE Model recommended by Martin Seligman.
Creativity does not mean being wrong. But if students are afraid to be wrong, they can never be creative. - Ken Robinson
4. Grow their Growth Mindset! (But with caution)
Growth Matters. And growth occurs best when students believe that their intelligence can grow, believe that effort outweighs talent, and believe that failure is not a threat to their ego but rather an opportunity for growth. These are tenets of the growth mindset, which I’ve shared in detail in another article, along with its research backing. (Do read it here)
Yet, do apply it with some cautions:
1. The Growth and Fixed Mindset exists on a spectrum. There are no true growth or fixed mindsets. If we label in binary terms, we may face unintended effects of judgement, labelling or what Dr Carol Dweck calls ‘false growth mindsets’, where we pretend to have growth mindsets to avoid being looked down upon (ironically an aspect of the fixed mindset)
2. The Growth Mindset is not meant to hide performance gaps. While the growth mindset celebrates effort, it is important not to use it as an excuse for not meeting outcomes, but rather as a coaching tool to help students achieve outcomes
Suggestions:
1. Be conscious about praising specific effort and process, especially in a group/or when addressing a class. Though its human nature and far easier to praise outcomes and the person, having intention to praise specific elements of effort has been shown to be one of the best ways to instill grit and long-term resilience
2. Following up on point 1, deliberate practice is important. This means helping students practice with a specific intent and focus on what improvements they are trying to make. This also links to suggestions on facilitated failure.
3. Talk about the value of focusing on process. Tell stories and highlight the joy of learning and the value of detachment from outcomes. This links to the importance of models and narratives too.
“Detachment does not mean disinterest. It means focusing your heart on the process and letting go of outcomes knowing you have no control over it. Detachment doesn’t mean you own nothing, it means nothing owns you”
5. Embodying Empathy & Vulnerability
(This is, in my opinion, the most important yet underrated point. If done right at a leadership level, it could dramatically raise collective resilience levels)
Vulnerability matters. Why? I highly highly recommend watching Brené Brown’s 2 Ted Talks here and here (you may read the transcript if you’re busy). She is somewhat of a mini pop star in her field of research.
To summarize decades of her work, she found that 1 core variable separated people with a strong sense of love and belonging and those who struggle for it – worthiness. People who had it simply believed they were worthy. And 1 core trait in people who believed they were worthy was this – they embraced vulnerability; they saw it as neither good or bad, they saw it as necessary.
How is this relevant to schools and students? With Asian cultural influences and a KPI driven society, showing vulnerability is perceived to be a sign of weakness. This fear of judgement or shame hinders vulnerability.
Hence, when faced with psychological issues, many students resort to numbing or suppression, both of which are proven to be horrible ways to deal with emotions.
If we are to build cultures of empathy, inclusiveness and one where students are open to seeking help, we MUST start with vulnerability.
“If you put shame in a Petri dish, it needs three things to grow exponentially: secrecy, silence and judgment. If you put the same amount in a Petri dish and douse it with empathy, it can't survive. The two most powerful words when we're in struggle: me too” - Brené Brown
The above quote really irks and invigorates me at the same time. Why? Because we are so far off from an ideal. Yet, therein lies the potential. Building a resilient culture is exponentially aided by a culture of vulnerability.
Before I share suggestions, let me tell one last story that illustrates.
In Jan 2021, I trained in a school. In one of our programmes, we conduct an activity called ‘Walk the Line’. Students line up in a row at the back of the classroom and I read out statements of increasing disclosure and vulnerability. If they relate to the statement, they walk to a line (marked by a masking tape), and turn and face their classmates for about 30s. The activity is silent. It is designed precisely to enable vulnerability and empathy.
After the activity, a student handed me a handwritten note. It read:
“Thank you. I really enjoyed this. It made me let out all my emotions I’ve been holding in for months. I now know there are friends going through similar struggles and are here to love and support me. Thank you.”
After class, another student walks up to me. She thanks me, then asks for advice. She says she used to think of taking her life, back in Pri 4 and 5.
“It is better now,” she says.
She ends off by saying “Thank you Cher, because of you, I’ll decide to seek help”
I held my emotions back. But when I left the conversation, I teared quite uncontrollably.
Suggestions:
1. Vulnerability breeds vulnerability. In the above example, I believe it was partially made possible because I was willing to be vulnerable with students; to share my past challenges with my mental health and how I sought help. It set the stage for the activity. For school’s to create this culture, it has to start with school leaders, which spills over to teachers, and eventually to students’ and class cultures. I believe if principals were to go on stage, to go off record and be vulnerable with their own struggles and encourage help-seeking behaviour – it would be major leverage.
2. It is heartening to see the upcoming role of Peer Supporters in schools. These students must be adequately trained to embrace and encourage vulnerability, inclusiveness and be catalysts for creating a culture of psychological safety in classes.
3. Including it as part of a CCE curriculum. In my years of training before I set up my own company, I noticed many programmes were focused on tangible skills – public speaking, leadership, study skills, etc. Yet, almost none ever delved deep into vulnerability, shame and empathy. My guess is that they are tough topics to tackle, taboo even. Yet, knowing the potential to change and even save lives, and set a foundation for learning other skills, it is something worthwhile to look into.
Concluding Note
Thanks for reading! I hope this article provides adequate insight and suggestions for consideration. May we continue to strive towards raising the resilience, empathy and mental wellness of our nation’s youth.
-Kevin Wee.
Rebound with Resilience is a social enterprise specializing in building resilience, mental wellness and enabling peer support culture and skills. We also work with people with disabilities, giving them opportunities to speak in schools and inspire youth with their stories of resilience. Click here for our background, track record and programme synopsis. Since inception, we have worked with over 20 schools and served over 10,000+ students.
If we are to encourage studying, then as educators & leaders, we have to model it too. Subscribe to our podcast on Spotify or Youtube, or join our Telegram channel more inspiration and information on building your resilience and mental wellness, and helping others do the same. (Click on embedded links above to access them)