Steve (Paralympian & Speaker)

I would often fall down and get cuts and bruises. Yet, the physical pain was nothing compared to the emotional one. When I bumped into others, many would get annoyed and shout “You blind or what?”

I love playing sports – soccer, basketball, track and field, swimming, cycling, and many others. I have seen the beautiful world – I like travelling, chilling out, watching movies and dramas. Not much different from many of you.

But that changed in 2004. I was diagnosed with an incurable eye condition called Retinitis Pigmentosa (RP). Over time my vision got blurrier and narrower, till it was lost.

Imagine a young man in his 20s, full of high hopes and dreams, stuck by this misfortunate. I was in a state of shock. I kept asking ‘Why me?’ I isolated myself. I didn’t want to get out of my house. I didn’t want to fall down. I didn’t want people’s insults.

One day, something turned my life around. I was awakened by a thunderstorm. I realised I was very hungry, as I hadn’t eaten the whole day. So I took an umbrella and went out to get food. Along the way, I slipped and fell on the concrete, there was blood dripping down my shin. But I was very hungry, so I endured the pain and got my food.

On my way back, I realised something: If you are hungry, you will find a way to get food. If I’m hungry enough, I will find a way to overcome my adversities. I realised I lost my hunger for life.

At that moment, I decided to be hungry for life again. I furthered my studies and graduated with a double degree in IT. Yet, many employers rejected me because of my disability, I failed 12 interviews in 1 year. I was losing my hunger again, getting dejected. But an inner voice told me I must not quit. On the 13th interview, I got accepted to work in a call centre. Within 2.5 years, I was promoted to a team leader and supervisor. In 2014, I was honoured to be a recipient of the Exemplary Employee Award held by the Enabling Employer's Network and SgEnable.

Now when people ask me how I overcome, I tell this story of the thunderstorm. We all face ‘storms’ in life. You may get wet, fall down and ‘bleed’ a little, but if you have the hunger, a desire and a goal, you will always get back up and find a way.

At first, I could not accept my situation. I felt I could no longer do things I love like play sports. I refused to use a walking stick because I was embarrassed. When I finally decided to change, I realized it was not that bad, a lot of fears were in my head. I started loving life again, working at things that made me happy, and got back my self-confidence.

I started playing sports again. I picked up blind football, where there’s a bell in the ball that allows me to locate and kick it. I captained the Singapore team in the 2015 Asean Para Games. I picked up tandem cycling last year too, where there would be a sighted guide in front to steer the bicycle, and I’ll be at the back peddling, like the ‘engine’ of the bike. I love it and train 5 times a week after work.

I also started public speaking, I take leave from work to share my story with students, to inspire them to overcome their struggles. I want to improve as a motivational speaker. My dream is to write a book in 2-3 years time.

It was a proud moment. I never expected it, I just did my best. It felt good that I could bring glory to my country. It means a lot to me, because It’s not just a public victory, but a private one. Behind the medal, is hours of training, but most importantly, the tough struggle and triumph over my disability. After the competition, a reporter asked me to share one line of advice. I said: “Don’t let your disability (both physical and mental) disable your abilities”. If I can do it, I believe you can do it 💪

Zahier (Musician & Speaker)

Part 1: London is a beautiful place. I went there for a school trip in Secondary 1. I remember sitting in a private coach that took us to tourist attractions. I felt captivated as I took the sights in.

Several years later, I sit on a wheelchair in the hospital. It was dark, all I could hear were murmurs as nurses wheeled me around for eye tests. I felt like I was a test subject. I felt angry and hurt.

“I’m sorry Zahier, I did my best, but could not recover your sight”. Those words hit me hard. I would be blind for the rest of my life. I was totally lost.

I would lie awake in bed and hear my Mum crying in the other room. My role as the eldest son was reversed, I felt ‘weak’ as I needed help in everything. I could not accept it.

I went back to school after taking a year off, but my friends had all graduated. It was lonely and things were different, I had to use a white cane to move around.

One morning, I was walking to morning assembly. All of a sudden, someone push me very hard from the side! It was an accident, but I couldn’t control my emotions. I got angry, lifted my cane, and swung it in the direction I was pushed. Thankfully, I missed. But, you see...it made me feel so useless.

Part 2: loved playing the guitar and performing. At first, I believed I could no longer do it. I could not see the chords nor where to place my fingers. But my cousin believed in me. She told me about Jose Feliciano, a famous guitarist who was born blind. I gave it a try. I would hear new songs, and match the notes the notes on my guitar. After some effort, it worked 🎸😄

Playing the guitar helped me regain my confidence. I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself. I accepted what I couldn’t change and focused on what I could. Life is still full of adventure!

I got help from Singapore Association of the Visually Handicapped. I met many other people whose stories of resilience inspired me. I learnt to use my other senses and skills to be independent.

Since then, I’m grateful for how far I've come. I was invited to perform in the President’s Star Charity with Sezairi Sezali. I am in a band now and we perform occasionally. On weekdays, I work at a perfumery where I test scents for quality. I also ventured to public speaking. It was scary, but I grew to love it. Recently, I went to a school to share my story, and sung a song for them. Two boys came up to me in tears, saying I inspired them.

It was the first time this happened. I was emotional too. I was not ‘useless’ like I once thought. I am loved, valued and useful ❤️

Part 3 (Euis): My good friend introduced Zahier to me. When I look for a potential partner, I look at the heart, rather than the appearance. So I was ok with Zahier’s condition. We first chatted over WhatsApp. I enjoyed the conversations. He’s funny and makes me smile. When we finally met, I fell more in love. I admire his resilience and optimism. But most importantly, he is serious about me, and he assured me that we can overcome any obstacles together. Every time I face a problem, he calms me down with his advice and care. He makes me feel peaceful.

Part 4: became a father recently! I feel overwhelming love when I hold my baby boy. I talk to him and tickle him, and he responds with adorable sounds and giggles. I burp him and rock him to sleep too. It makes me feel good that I can do something for him. I smile inside when I think of him, it feels surreal…he’s my baby boy! When I feel stressed after coming back from work, I hold him and immediately feel better. I have this strong sense of responsibility. To do better. To work hard. I want to do all I can to make sure my boy has a bright future.

Boon Keng (Motivational Speaker)

I live with muscular dystrophy, a condition which gradually weakens my muscles. Despite it, I worked hard through Poly and University, and graduated with a social work degree. Yet when I started work, my physical limitation made it difficult to perform many tasks, so eventually, I had no choice but to quit. It felt like all I've worked for was lost. I lost my motivation, got frustrated over small things and for a period, felt my life was meaningless.

Gradually, I realised what I studied wasn’t 'wasted'; the skills and knowledge that I picked up can be applied in other areas. I rekindled my confidence and belief, and pursued my dream to be a motivational speaker. It was scary at first, but I’m getting used to it and it’s been wonderful so far.

When I speak to students, I can relate as many feel like me when their initial expectations are not met. But I tell them, there are many areas you can explore. Just try new things, don’t be afraid to fail. The knowledge and soft skills you pick up can be applied to many different careers.

To me, resilience doesn’t mean never falling down or avoiding challenges, because you are bound to fall down. Resilience means you keep trying and climb back up. Eventually, you will get back up 💪

Boon Keng & his Mum

I've always wanted a pet dog since primary school, but my Mum wasn’t too keen. About 2 years ago, she finally agreed. Not just that, she even went the extra mile to take care of our dog’s needs. I was so touched, because my Mum’s love for me was bigger than her concerns. She wanted me to be happy.

I love her dearly, I am where I am because of her. She is strong-willed, gentle & supported me throughout my life, despite knowing my condition will worsen slowly. She gave me the freedom to make my choices, she comforted me when I felt low, she followed me throughout my schooling life until my graduation. She waits for me when I'm having classes, helps me when I need to go to the toilet and joins me and my classmates for lunch.

Recently, she can’t carry me anymore, so we had to hire a domestic helper. I’m glad she finally gets a rest after 20 years, although she still follows me around, it’s part of her. She comes to my public speaking programs, takes videos and pictures of me, and claps along even though she doesn’t understand English. When I see the pride in her eyes, I am grateful.

My advice to students would be to increase mutual understanding and love with your parents. Maybe find a time to ask them out for a meal, they’ll be pleasantly surprised. Just have a chat & know them better. Once there is a stronger relationship, it becomes easier to communicate when you have different values and opinions. It’s also easier to open up and seek help when you need to.