In primary school, I started to notice.. ‘ah, I was different’. When we lined up, I was always the first. I also started to get teased. My only channel was my brother. He advised me, but at that time, it didn’t go in. Secondary school was better, but the self-consciousness always lingered. When I started work, I had a hard time getting a job, but eventually settled for an accounting role.
I was afraid of networking and people. When I meet someone, at the back of my mind, there was always this thought ‘What are others thinking about me? Because of this, I retreated into my comfort zone. I didn’t reveal much about myself, for fear of being hurt.
After 5 years of working, I finally realised, this is not the future I want, this is not where I want to retire. I wanted to step out of comfort and overcome whatever baggage I carried.
I started to look for opportunities, and got introduced to my current mentor, Alvin Yong. He was an amazingly open hearted and accepting person. He introduced me to the world of business, and encouraged me to attend seminars to build up self-worth and skills. I was shy at first, but slowly, the association helped me grow. I started to speak to people, to work on my own distribution business. Entrepreneurship grew on me; it was a platform to overcome by deep seated insecurity and show to myself that I wasn’t limited by my condition. After a while of working hard, the income from my business grew, and I’ve left my full time job since 2007.
Despite the progress, it’s a constant journey. Once a lady from the Philippines contacted me about a potential business partnership. She was tall, slim and beautiful, and owned an aesthetic clinic. My thoughts nagged me again: ‘Would she really want to partner me? Would she listen if I speak to her? Would she respect me?’
But my mentor pulled me up. He said: “Don’t feel small. You have your own value. You know your product, you have expertise in your right”. With that, I’m now enjoying a close and profitable partnership with the lady.
My experience taught me a major lesson: Self Esteem isn’t rooted in my outer appearance. Self-Esteem is rooted in my belief of my own intrinsic value. Do I believe my words and actions can influence people? Do I believe I can add value to others? When I take that approach, I feel less pressure and live life lighter.
I’ve developed a deep passion and gratification from helping others - be it through speaking, writing or one on one coaching. When you’ve added value to someone and they respond with gratitude, it’s a feeling that’s beyond words.
Through my learning, I’ve found myself being mesmerized by some speakers. They have an energy and vibe thats positive and magnetic. I thought ‘I want to work towards that too’.
So I developed a vision - to be a motivational speaker and eventually write a book. I love social media and want to reach out to more people. I share my inisghts, experiences and travels. Sometimes I check into hotels, and beds and showers are so high! I’ve got to check out and go to another hotel!
I hope my sharing can inspire people to be more empathetic to people who have different needs. Apart from that, I also want to reach out to youth, women, anyone who might have insecurity and self-imposed limits. I used to think if you’re tall, pretty, smart...you will have less insecurity, I realised that’s not true! That’s where I come in and share that there is hope, that you can overcome that mental disability and live a life without limits!
If my story can help others to make a change in their lives, I’m grateful. That is enough for me.
