I live with muscular dystrophy, a condition which gradually weakens my muscles. Despite it, I worked hard through Poly and University, and graduated with a social work degree. Yet when I started work, my physical limitation made it difficult to perform many tasks, so eventually, I had no choice but to quit. It felt like all I've worked for was lost. I lost my motivation, got frustrated over small things and for a period, felt my life was meaningless.
Gradually, I realised what I studied wasn’t 'wasted'; the skills and knowledge that I picked up can be applied in other areas. I rekindled my confidence and belief, and pursued my dream to be a motivational speaker. It was scary at first, but I’m getting used to it and it’s been wonderful so far.
When I speak to students, I can relate as many feel like me when their initial expectations are not met. But I tell them, there are many areas you can explore. Just try new things, don’t be afraid to fail. The knowledge and soft skills you pick up can be applied to many different careers.
To me, resilience doesn’t mean never falling down or avoiding challenges, because you are bound to fall down. Resilience means you keep trying and climb back up. Eventually, you will get back up 💪
Boon Keng & his Mum
I've always wanted a pet dog since primary school, but my Mum wasn’t too keen. About 2 years ago, she finally agreed. Not just that, she even went the extra mile to take care of our dog’s needs. I was so touched, because my Mum’s love for me was bigger than her concerns. She wanted me to be happy.
I love her dearly, I am where I am because of her. She is strong-willed, gentle & supported me throughout my life, despite knowing my condition will worsen slowly. She gave me the freedom to make my choices, she comforted me when I felt low, she followed me throughout my schooling life until my graduation. She waits for me when I'm having classes, helps me when I need to go to the toilet and joins me and my classmates for lunch.
Recently, she can’t carry me anymore, so we had to hire a domestic helper. I’m glad she finally gets a rest after 20 years, although she still follows me around, it’s part of her. She comes to my public speaking programs, takes videos and pictures of me, and claps along even though she doesn’t understand English. When I see the pride in her eyes, I am grateful.
My advice to students would be to increase mutual understanding and love with your parents. Maybe find a time to ask them out for a meal, they’ll be pleasantly surprised. Just have a chat & know them better. Once there is a stronger relationship, it becomes easier to communicate when you have different values and opinions. It’s also easier to open up and seek help when you need to.